*dear diary

dear diary,

it's hard to say goodbye to this world where I've met you,
you never complain every time i punch you with my flooding tears,
you never laugh every time i confess you my million crushes,
you never judge me every time i quickly fell in love,
you never criticize me every time i done wrong and got some none sense mistakes,
you never left me for all my countless crazy failures,
but i got to leave you soon,
nobody would ever tell you my whole story...


before i leave this Earth,
i wanted to confess all my sins,
say sorry to my sister who hated me most,and
to my friends whom I have accidentally hurt,
...wanted to search for my long lost sister,
pray for the soul of my eldest brother
say Thank you to all the people who loved me,

before i leave,
there are things I wanted to do if I got a chance,
(If only life has rewinds)
I wanted to hug my father too tight and tell him:
"Thank you for being a nice father to me, I did everything to make you happy, wish you know how much I love you, and I did everything to be the best daughter you deserve."
(These are the things I never told him before he left me)

If only I could rewrite my story,
I would start it with my mother and tell her:
"You never know how much I missed and love you with all my heart, I'm so thankful for having you as my mother, wish I could give you back all the things you have done for me and for my life. I don't want to loose you, never in my wild dreams...please wait for me for my homecoming..."
(That was the things I failed to tell her...it's too late, she's already gone)

Life has no rewinds.

Oftentimes, we are always asking for "what if's" and "if ever"
we always looked back at yesterday
but never enjoyed the present
and begin worrying about the future

If only life is something we can predict,
then we should know what to do next,
when to do the right move,
where to go to refresh
and whom to spend our life with...

in my life,
I have learned everything,
i had loved, beloved and betrayed
I had failed, stand up and fall down again
i had done mistakes,learned from it and get over it...

dear diary, i only got 24 hours left...
thank you for letting me share my life with you...
I'll be very happy now, i will never meet loneliness and lonesome again...
it's much better to rest in peace now...

ciao!